Life – Page 5 – Yoga Mama in Minneapolis

Many Characters in Many Stories

February 8, 2013February 8, 2013 yogamamampls

At this time last year, I was preparing to leave for Scottsdale for the second week of my teacher training. It was two weeks filled with many moments, stories and characters, but the moment that I have been repeatedly thinking about lately is the morning practice on I believe our second day. I studied with the amazing Martin and Jordan Kirk. Martin was leading this particular practice. He started the class with the story of Hanuman helping to rescue Sita from a land across the great dark void called Lanka (a wonderful story for your kidlets if they enjoy adventure and super heroes). The story and the telling of it was spellbinding but what really stuck with me from it was when Martin then explained that in the stories of the Ramayana and of the Mahabharata, we are meant to be able to relate to ALL of the characters because we are ALL of the characters. The characters are different aspects of ourself.

The reason I have been coming back to this idea is that I have been really aware of the stories of others lately. Many joyful, some scary, some sad, and a great many just chugging along. I am a little awed by the idea that I may be a character in those same stories someday, or have been in the past. It also came up for me when I was trying to explain to LBL that war/conflict isn’t as simple as bad guys -vs-good guys. Everyone believes themselves to be the good guy fighting for what they believe in. Which makes it more complicated that just good and evil… I just heard an interview on MPR with Kevin Spacey, he was talking about his new show House of Cards. One of the subjects that he discussed was that he really liked roles where it isn’t clear if you liked him or not. There are many shows out there right now where the main characters are morally ambiguous. A single mama selling drugs, a cop that is also the serial killer of serial killers, the mobster that also loves and cares for his family… the list goes on. If a show, movie, or book are written well, we can emotionally connect to many different characters because we can see ourselves in those same roles. Just as we were meant to in those ancient texts in India.

At some point in all of our lives we are Hanuman leaping across the void, the soldier wounded on a field, Lancelot falling in love with his best friend’s wife, the wolf hiding inside of grandmother, the lover, the spectator and the narrator. I would like to think that believing in that idea may help to understand others and their actions a little more clearly and compassionately and to help us to remember that if we are unhappy with our current character, maybe it is time for the story to change.

Life

3

February 1, 2013 yogamamampls

Littlest Loes (LL) turned 3 on New Year’s Eve and since then, she has definitely made it known to us that she is changed. Although, it seems that she hasn’t quite decided in what direction this change is going yet. In the last month she has challenged us with obstinance, outright disobedience, tantrums, giving her teachers hell and more. On the flipside, she has also graced us with some of the sweetest snuggles and declarations of love while looking into our eyes and holding our cheeks in her little hands, and gifting us with the best belly laughs ever. Seemingly nothing in between these two versions of LL though…

In these moments I was finding myself just staring dumbfounded at Daddy Loes (DL) asking silently, “What changed? Where did my sweet little baby go?” “Did we go through this with Little Boy Loes (LBL)?” “Are we parenting differently?”

YES!!! To all of those questions!

When we finally took the time last week to really think about these questions… we realized that she grew up to her new age a little faster that we were ready for. In the last 5 months she has seemingly shed all of the last vestiges of babyhood, and we are just now catching up. Potty learning in October, starting school in September, learning to make friends for herself, knowing enough words to have the most lovely and sometimes not so lovely conversations with her brother, and giving up her pacifier and turning 3 in December. So much change and exploration. That being said, I think that one of the things that I was also reminded of this month was that 3 is a hard year for me personally to deal with. Not a baby, but yet not quite able to communicate like a bigger kid yet. A year of transition, and the universe knows that I am not always the best at transition.

So how can I help myself and LL move through this first of many transition year in a mindful and kind way? First, for me, remembering that it is okay to not be awesome in all areas of parenting and to go slowly. Allowing space for LL to explore who she is now and follow her lead, but also reminding her of boundaries. Second, feeling proud in the knowledge that DL and I have given her enough confidence in her foundation that she feels safe enough to explore. She knows that she will be loved, no matter what.

That seems like a good beginning to me, even if she did get a head start. Let’s she what she creates in this year of chaos.

Life

Words of Intention

January 25, 2013January 25, 2013 yogamamampls

Last year I was in a New Year’s yoga class and we were asked to think of a word of intention for the year. I loved this, resolutions are really meant to be broken. They are so often unachievable goals, of course we aren’t going to lose 20 lbs in two months with only a gym membership…. quitting smoking is really hard if there isn’t meaning behind the reason… and let’s face it, saying “No more screen time for the kids” is simply not realistic. (especially since I will continue to be on the computer and to watch my televised addictions) So, I loved the idea of a word, a mantra, to take with me into the year. No commitment to change drastically, just a commitment to hold this word in my heart and think of it. Last year my word was Remembrance, I found that just thinking of the word in quiet moments, during a yoga class, dealing with my children, helped me to remember. Remember who I wanted to be and what I wanted my family to be. Fortunately, (maybe unfortunately, we will ask them in a few years) my intentions also become my family’s intention. Last year, we tried to spend a lot more time with grandparents and telling the kids stories of our past and of our family members that aren’t with us. I love that even though they didn’t get a ton of time with their Grandpa Pete, they will always remember him. I also found myself volunteering to help plan my 15 year class reunion…. scary, but ended up being so fun! I didn’t realize it at the time but Teenager Stephanie was an awesome girl and as I continue to remember her, I am sure I will learn a lot from her. Remembrance.

This year’s word was Mindfulness, which as it turns out, isn’t actually a word! Oops, so we are going to go with Being Mindful.

mind·ful

adjective \ˈmīn(d)-fəl

Definition of MINDFUL

: bearing in mind : aware

: inclined to be aware

Awareness… teaching myself and my family to become more aware of the world around us, and taking note of how that awareness changes us. A challenge for sure but we will just have to see what 2013 has to teach us!